Living a Solo lifestyle certainly does not mean spending your days and nights depressed and lonely. It sure as heck does not mean spending every waking hour searching for that “perfect someone".
Oh heck no. Living a solo lifestyle means that you have the freedom to make your own choices. Lifestyle choices such as where to live, how much money to budget for certain items, furniture and other items to either purchase or purge. Choices such as whether or not to cook dinner, especially at a specific time. Living solo provides the freedom to enjoy time with your friends when you so desire…or to stay home alone if that is what you want.
I understand that not everyone is comfortable being alone. They do in fact get lonely or feel the need to constantly be doing something or going somewhere. Perhaps they don’t enjoy their own company, or don’t realize how truly wonderful they are. Perhaps they feel if they are constantly on the go their friends and family won’t feel as sorry for them for not “having someone"
Did you know there are some people that are actually “single at heart"? These are people that cherish their own space, their alone time. They don’t feel the need to become a partner to someone else. They know they are whole individuals and do not need someone else to “complete" them. These people include all ages, genders and sexual preferences. Those single-at-heart people tend to live their lives fully and enthusiastically.
But there are others that are just plain single – sometimes through no choice of their own, whether through divorce, widowhood or just not meeting that “special someone". They are single though feel that life might be better with a partner.
The way I look at it is that even if you are a not-by-choice-single you might as well learn to enjoy your life through this time. Learn to enjoy your “me" time, your alone time. Have fun making those decisions as to where to go on vacation (with no one else wanting to go someplace else). Learn to enjoy cooking and eating meals whenever you want to or take yourself out to eat on the spur of the moment.
Why do I believe these singles-not-by-choice should embrace their singlehood? Because one never knows how long that singlehood is going to turn out to be.
Are you a single that is always searching?
You know, even if you are one of those singles that are constantly searching for the “perfect someone" don’t you think that you should learn to love yourself first and foremost? Once you learn to love who you are it is so much easier and wonderful to love someone else and in fact, to accept that persons love in return.
Well who the heck am I?
And what makes me think I’m such an expert?
Let’s just say that I made some mistakes in my younger years (as in 2 very short failed marriages). It seems that even way back then (closing in on 45 years) I realized that I was not “marriage material". Honestly, I never enjoyed the part of having to live with someone. I mean seriously, I had no privacy, no space of my own and certainly not the freedom I have now!.
Of course, back in the day, I felt certain that I would marry once again and live happily ever after. Yea, that didn’t happen. I never married again and certainly have no intention of doing so at any point in the future.
In fact, I have remained single and have learned through the years to totally enjoy my life even with it’s numerous ups and downs.
But an expert? Absolutely not! I am constantly learning about life and about who I am…as we all are. I don’t proclaim to be an expert and have made numerous mistakes in my own life. But through the years I have also found joy and a solo lifestyle that suits me. I have an active life – when I want that and at the same time very much enjoy cocooning in my own private environment.
I believe that we can all learn from one another and am totally open to comments – both for and against what I have to say. Since life itself is a journey, we better make it as good and as fun as at all possible.
You can learn more of my story on my “About Me" page.
“Somewhere along the way people became afraid to be single. To be unmarried, separate from others and lost their individuality searching for it in society’s view of relationships.”
~ Sanjo Jendayi, I Now Pronounce You Single & Happy