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Is knowing his age really that important?

age-is-simply-a-limitation-

 

Personally I say age makes no difference…

Are we women (and probably men as well) limiting ourselves as we get older? I mean, I hear women of a certain age complain that there are no decent men to date and yea, I get it.

At least to a certain extent I get it.

The thing is though that many of these women are talking about men older than themselves. Because you see, they don’t want to date a younger man.

Many of these women describe men older than them as being grayed hair (which personally I think is sexy), beer bellied, out of shape, full straggly beards, and not well.

Well to that I say Bunk!

Personally I know quite a few men that I believe are older than myself that are in fantastic shape. They are out doing many things such as golf, tennis, hiking, kayaking, river rafting, camping, taking classes and learning new things and all sorts of great activities.

Sure many of them might have aches and pains but my goodness…so do we sisters!

And sure many may also have gray hair but if they died it as women do would we accept that? Not sure that we would. The thing here is that many of us women in this age group also have gray hair, but we are just better at covering it up.

Beer bellies? Yep some of the men I know have them though I also know (and see) many that do not have them. And come on ladies…let’s admit it…our bodies have also changed with age.

Not in good health? Well yes, things can start going haywire as we age. I know several women that have medical conditions as well as some men. That is part of life. Some we can do something about…others maybe not so much. Honestly though it is more about how one deals with those medical issues that would be of concern to me.

My question to these women though is why the hell does age matter?

Ok, so I admit that when my son at age 16 met a gal almost 5 years older than him I was quite concerned. Especially when he told me he was going to marry her (this being the first night he met her!) At that tender age I did believe that age was a huge factor. But…they remained together and have now been married 27 years and seem to still be going quite strong. Yep…mom was quite wrong in that instance.

A friend of mine had been dating quite a bit over the past several years. She would always comment about the age of the individual whether he was younger or older than she was. I questioned her many times about why age mattered and honestly she could never give me a good answer. I suggested to her that she quit asking the guys age. She is now dating a wonderful guy that is several years younger and has never been happier.

I have met guys that are younger than me that honestly I would consider old. They act old and they are not in good health (and let it be known!) and they are not very active. Those are not the guys that I want to be dating…even if they are younger than me.

A very good friend of mine is 17 years older than me and is a hell of a lot more active than many of the younger guys I know…and is in great health and has a fantastic personality!

Sure supposedly men in our age group are looking for the younger women. Or so I’ve been told…by women. Honestly I have never heard a man say that. It has always been women that have told me that and I must wonder where they learned that.

Tough I would suspect that men who are looking for a younger woman may actually be wanting to start a family (or a new family!). And I’m not sure about most of my friends but that is sure as hell not what I’m looking to do!

You see most of the couples that I know that have met recently are not December/May relationships. They are relationships in which both parties are approximately the same age…or at least in the same generation. And as far as I can tell these relationships are pretty damn solid.

Relationships are so much more than age.

They are all about how well the two people get along; how they show respect for one another; how they help each other out when in need; how they make one another laugh out loud; how they care for one another when sadness strikes, and on and on and on.

Relationships are about enjoying the other person’s company, enjoying doing things together and yet accepting there are things that are enjoyable alone as well. It is about accepting the other person for who they are without trying to change them into a mold. It is knowing that the other person is liked and respected by his friends and family and also being accepted by them.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. ~Mark Twain

And frankly, none of those things stated about relationships have a damn thing to do with age.

Perhaps it is time to just see people for who they are as opposed to the number of years they have lived.

Perhaps it is time to seek out the best people instead of pigeon holding people into various generations.

We need to remember that we have never been the age that we are currently. We actually have no handbook to guide us along in life. There are no rules as to who we can or cannot (or should or should not) date. In fact, I would state that it has opened up much more for us than in the past where in some places there were unwritten rules.

So go forth my friends…date someone that makes you laugh…respects the hell out of you…and treats you in the manner that you should be treated (just don’t forget to return all those in kind).

Joyfully yours,
Kendra

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